...And in the air, the fireflies, our only light in paradise. We'll show the world that they were wrong, and teach them all to sing along; singing Amen I, I'm alive. Amen I, I'm alive...

- Nickelback, If Everyone Cared

For All The Right Reasons Album

And I'm singing Aaa-ayyy-men, I'm alive!

William Leonidas November 12th, 2009
My only regret is that I cried so many tears while I waited for you.

"...I'll try ~ but it's so hard to believe. I'll try ~ but I can't see what you see. I'll try and try to understand the distance between the love I feel ~ the thing I fear ~ and every single dream. I can finally see it. Now I have to believe all those precious stories. All the world is made of faith ~ and trust ~ and pixie dust. So I'll try ~ because I finally believe. I'll try ~ because I can see what you see. I'll try, I'll try ~ to fly..."

Jonatha Brooke "I'll try"

Fear thou not, for I am with thee; be not dismayed, for I am thy God; I will strengthen thee; yea, I will help thee; yea, I will uphold thee with the right hand of my righteousness. Isaiah 41:10

Now the word of the Lord came to me saying, "Before I formed you in the womb I knew you, and before you were born I consecrated you..." Jeremiah 1:4-5

For Thou didst form my inward parts; Thou didst weave me in my mother's womb. I will give thanks to Thee for I am fearfully and wonderfully made; wonderful are Thy works, and my soul knows it very well. Psalms 139:13-14

Monday March 5th, 2010

So Why Stinkerie?

It's simple, really. It's the first thing I whispered against my newborn little Dumpling's temple as I held him alone for that very first time. "There's my Little Stinkerie." And all was right with the world as I brushed my lips across his delicate dewy soft newborn-pink skin and sniffed at his sparse smattering of downy soft hair. Corny and sappy, huh? I can't help it when describing my new Little Puppy. But don't get used to it - I have been told I am "irreverent."

Anyway, it just came out and he's been Stinkerie ever since. As well as Stink Pie, Stink Pot, Stinkey Pete, Little Stinks, Stinks, Puppy, Ducky, Baby, Baby Head, Baby Head Jenkins, Jack, Jack-Jack, Jackie Boy, Jax, Snork, Snorkis, Snorkle, Billy Boy, Billy Bob, Bobby Sue, Billy-Joe-Jim-Bob, Will, Willie, Willister, and the name given by my mentor turned friend Beth - Snake. When I write to her I call him either The Snakester or Slither! And of course, Dumpling, because he is my Little Dumpling - warm and soft and comforting. It's alright to combine comfort food with baby names, right? Have you ever watched the movie Where the Heart Is? If you have, you'll know why I mention this in my defense!

Long story short, you're likely to encounter any one or more of these names in a single post. Because I can. It's my blog!

Something to Consider

Bad decisions make good stories.

Something to Think About

With any pregnancy, there are concerns. With any child, there are worries. When you have a diagnosis of Down syndrome, you know what to worry about. You know what to look for. You have a plan of action. With your typical child, there is no limit to the things that can 'go wrong' or 'happen.' There's no place to focus your worry and concerns. 'IT' will always be out there, waiting. You'll always be on guard. Even when the child is 55 and has grandchildren. With Down syndrome we have a battle plan. With Down syndrome, there is a finite number of things that can go awry. With a typical child, there's isn't. It's a crap shoot. I'm sticking with the Ds and taking the other two back to the hospital for a refund.

Head Above Water

MusicPlaylistView Profile
Create a playlist at MixPod.com

Saturday, July 31, 2010

Rock 'n' Ride

Late in June The Beloved and I went to the Rock 'n' Ride for Autism because, well, we have at least two Littles with ASD. It was sponsored by our local Harley Davidson dealership. We bought Willie his first bad-ass-biker outfit. The best part of the day was definitely riding the scoot! It's been a long time since I've gotten to ride on the donor cycle but the wait was certainly worth the ride! The Older Littles have gotten to ride more than I have, and it does stop my heart just a little to see them beaming up at me from the back of a murder cycle, but I have to remind myself that The Dear Daddy is more than aware of his precious cargo. Growing up, The Beloved, then just Boyfriend, was one of only two people I ever felt safe riding with. The other was my Youngest Older Brother. The one addicted to heroin and coke. Go figure. I clearly remember my Mom and I standing at the kitchen window one afternoon waiting for my brother to arrive. We could hear his motorcycle as it got off the freeway about a mile away. We could tell when he turned onto the boulevard by how the whine of the motor decreased, and just how fast he was approaching by how loud it got. We went to the window when it was clear he'd barely decelerated from the boulevard to come down our street. And he pulled his Harley up to the curb and parked and got off of it. All 6'1" of him. Barefooted and bare chested. Wearing nothing but Boxer shorts. As in underwear. Things you wear under pants. I thought my Mom was going to drop her teeth! But that's a story for another day. One of these days I will post a page about my sordid past and sketchy upbringing. For now, here's a picture of Willie in his new duds!
I hesitate to post this one because I didn't realise how yukky my profile is. But here it is. Will is being allowed to sleep on his side for once because no matter how many times I put him back onto his back, he just kept rolling to get me. He's keeping his binkie in his mouth for the first time ever all by himself!
Here we are, sharing warmth. Sharing breath. I love this boy!


Patti said...

Oh gosh, this picture is just so precious...love it!!

Tracy said...

Thank you Patti! I love seeing pictures of darling Lily! She is such a beauty!