...And in the air, the fireflies, our only light in paradise. We'll show the world that they were wrong, and teach them all to sing along; singing Amen I, I'm alive. Amen I, I'm alive...

- Nickelback, If Everyone Cared

For All The Right Reasons Album

And I'm singing Aaa-ayyy-men, I'm alive!

William Leonidas November 12th, 2009
My only regret is that I cried so many tears while I waited for you.

"...I'll try ~ but it's so hard to believe. I'll try ~ but I can't see what you see. I'll try and try to understand the distance between the love I feel ~ the thing I fear ~ and every single dream. I can finally see it. Now I have to believe all those precious stories. All the world is made of faith ~ and trust ~ and pixie dust. So I'll try ~ because I finally believe. I'll try ~ because I can see what you see. I'll try, I'll try ~ to fly..."

Jonatha Brooke "I'll try"

Fear thou not, for I am with thee; be not dismayed, for I am thy God; I will strengthen thee; yea, I will help thee; yea, I will uphold thee with the right hand of my righteousness. Isaiah 41:10

Now the word of the Lord came to me saying, "Before I formed you in the womb I knew you, and before you were born I consecrated you..." Jeremiah 1:4-5

For Thou didst form my inward parts; Thou didst weave me in my mother's womb. I will give thanks to Thee for I am fearfully and wonderfully made; wonderful are Thy works, and my soul knows it very well. Psalms 139:13-14

Monday March 5th, 2010

So Why Stinkerie?

It's simple, really. It's the first thing I whispered against my newborn little Dumpling's temple as I held him alone for that very first time. "There's my Little Stinkerie." And all was right with the world as I brushed my lips across his delicate dewy soft newborn-pink skin and sniffed at his sparse smattering of downy soft hair. Corny and sappy, huh? I can't help it when describing my new Little Puppy. But don't get used to it - I have been told I am "irreverent."

Anyway, it just came out and he's been Stinkerie ever since. As well as Stink Pie, Stink Pot, Stinkey Pete, Little Stinks, Stinks, Puppy, Ducky, Baby, Baby Head, Baby Head Jenkins, Jack, Jack-Jack, Jackie Boy, Jax, Snork, Snorkis, Snorkle, Billy Boy, Billy Bob, Bobby Sue, Billy-Joe-Jim-Bob, Will, Willie, Willister, and the name given by my mentor turned friend Beth - Snake. When I write to her I call him either The Snakester or Slither! And of course, Dumpling, because he is my Little Dumpling - warm and soft and comforting. It's alright to combine comfort food with baby names, right? Have you ever watched the movie Where the Heart Is? If you have, you'll know why I mention this in my defense!

Long story short, you're likely to encounter any one or more of these names in a single post. Because I can. It's my blog!

Something to Consider

Bad decisions make good stories.

Something to Think About

With any pregnancy, there are concerns. With any child, there are worries. When you have a diagnosis of Down syndrome, you know what to worry about. You know what to look for. You have a plan of action. With your typical child, there is no limit to the things that can 'go wrong' or 'happen.' There's no place to focus your worry and concerns. 'IT' will always be out there, waiting. You'll always be on guard. Even when the child is 55 and has grandchildren. With Down syndrome we have a battle plan. With Down syndrome, there is a finite number of things that can go awry. With a typical child, there's isn't. It's a crap shoot. I'm sticking with the Ds and taking the other two back to the hospital for a refund.

Head Above Water

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Sunday, December 6, 2009

Due Date, First Bath & a Visit with Santa!

Today was our original due date. My Little Bean is 3 weeks and 3 days old. To celebrate, we've decided to take our new belly button for a bath! I warmed up the house and gathered everything on the dining room table. For the record, it's pretty tricky deciding just how warm to get the water for the first ever bath at home!

As The Littles gathered round I lowered Willie Boy into the water. He got a little scared and that sad face nearly broke my heart. I spoke sweet and calm to him and as soon as he was stable in the water I put my hand on his head and his chest and tummy until he looked calm again. His little scared face made me want to cry, but once he was sure that all was well, he started to kick and wiggle quite a bit. He had a few startle reflexes, but he didn't cry. He even seemed to get relaxed and dreamy for his shampoo! Once all of his delicious baby smells were washed away, I lifted him out onto the warm towel waiting and bundled him up good. From there it is truly a mad dash to the finish to get the wet baby diapered before he can pee! And then I dried him all off and got him dressed in fresh warm clothes. I have to say that the only thing more challenging than washing between particularly tiny baby toes is drying between particularly tiny baby toes! All in all, I think the new belly button's first trip through the bath went very well!

Later in the day we headed off to the dreaded mall to make the returns of the missed baby shower prizes. Our mall in December is as insane as any other mall in December. It should be avoided at all costs, as the parking lot alone makes you wonder why you are taking your life into your hands. And once inside it goes downhill from there and... but what is this...? There is no line to see Santa! We must have been hit by a lucky moon beam this morning, because once we were done, the line to see the Jolly Old Elf stretched out to the parking lot! Neither of The Littles wanted anything to do with Santa this year, due to an unfortunate turn of events with a very mean "elf" last year, but Sweet William was quite content to have his sleeping self placed into Santa's arms for a picture or two! The Middle did eventually tell Santa what he wanted for Christmas, but he wasn't getting into the lap for a picture. I was sad to see this bit of magic die for My Olders, but comforted to know that side by side with it's passing, I can start again kindling the magic of Santa Claus with Sweet William! And both of The Olders know that the mall Santa isn't the real one...they are the retired Santas who still enjoy bringing magic to children. Yes, they both still believe!

Bobby-Sue-Jim-Bob capped off his big day by having a 45 minute wiggle fest later at home. He enjoys looking around at everything with lots of head turning. I'm a wee bit concerned about his robust level of activity...if he is awake he is in constant frenetic motion! If he's still at all, he is asleep.

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