Jax is 12 weeks and 4 days old. We finally had that connect today, that one where you hold your baby and he looks into your eyes for the first time and you bond. Most Mommy's have this moment at birth. But we finally had ours. Finally. It was that wondering inquiry usually reserved for meeting one's Mama for the first time. He really looked at me for the first time. I thought it would never happen. I've always been the face above the bottle, above the diaper, above the car seat, above the cradle. But today he looked at me!
And he hasn't stopped looking at me. He's still all business while he's eating, but after he finished, he went right back to looking at me. At nap time this afternoon he kept looking at me instead of me just gazing at him. After about 15 minutes he must have decided that I'd still be there when he woke up because he finally went to sleep.
Once the kids were off to bed this evening, Jax and I settled on the couch to watch a chick flick and look into each other's eyes. And he gave me two big grins! I'm falling in love with him all over again. I feel like I've finally met him. And I told him so. While we swayed around the room together.
It turns out that I AM happy in this new world baby William has shown me!
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