...And in the air, the fireflies, our only light in paradise. We'll show the world that they were wrong, and teach them all to sing along; singing Amen I, I'm alive. Amen I, I'm alive...

- Nickelback, If Everyone Cared

For All The Right Reasons Album

And I'm singing Aaa-ayyy-men, I'm alive!

William Leonidas November 12th, 2009
My only regret is that I cried so many tears while I waited for you.

"...I'll try ~ but it's so hard to believe. I'll try ~ but I can't see what you see. I'll try and try to understand the distance between the love I feel ~ the thing I fear ~ and every single dream. I can finally see it. Now I have to believe all those precious stories. All the world is made of faith ~ and trust ~ and pixie dust. So I'll try ~ because I finally believe. I'll try ~ because I can see what you see. I'll try, I'll try ~ to fly..."

Jonatha Brooke "I'll try"

Fear thou not, for I am with thee; be not dismayed, for I am thy God; I will strengthen thee; yea, I will help thee; yea, I will uphold thee with the right hand of my righteousness. Isaiah 41:10

Now the word of the Lord came to me saying, "Before I formed you in the womb I knew you, and before you were born I consecrated you..." Jeremiah 1:4-5

For Thou didst form my inward parts; Thou didst weave me in my mother's womb. I will give thanks to Thee for I am fearfully and wonderfully made; wonderful are Thy works, and my soul knows it very well. Psalms 139:13-14

Monday March 5th, 2010

So Why Stinkerie?

It's simple, really. It's the first thing I whispered against my newborn little Dumpling's temple as I held him alone for that very first time. "There's my Little Stinkerie." And all was right with the world as I brushed my lips across his delicate dewy soft newborn-pink skin and sniffed at his sparse smattering of downy soft hair. Corny and sappy, huh? I can't help it when describing my new Little Puppy. But don't get used to it - I have been told I am "irreverent."

Anyway, it just came out and he's been Stinkerie ever since. As well as Stink Pie, Stink Pot, Stinkey Pete, Little Stinks, Stinks, Puppy, Ducky, Baby, Baby Head, Baby Head Jenkins, Jack, Jack-Jack, Jackie Boy, Jax, Snork, Snorkis, Snorkle, Billy Boy, Billy Bob, Bobby Sue, Billy-Joe-Jim-Bob, Will, Willie, Willister, and the name given by my mentor turned friend Beth - Snake. When I write to her I call him either The Snakester or Slither! And of course, Dumpling, because he is my Little Dumpling - warm and soft and comforting. It's alright to combine comfort food with baby names, right? Have you ever watched the movie Where the Heart Is? If you have, you'll know why I mention this in my defense!

Long story short, you're likely to encounter any one or more of these names in a single post. Because I can. It's my blog!

Something to Consider

Bad decisions make good stories.

Something to Think About

With any pregnancy, there are concerns. With any child, there are worries. When you have a diagnosis of Down syndrome, you know what to worry about. You know what to look for. You have a plan of action. With your typical child, there is no limit to the things that can 'go wrong' or 'happen.' There's no place to focus your worry and concerns. 'IT' will always be out there, waiting. You'll always be on guard. Even when the child is 55 and has grandchildren. With Down syndrome we have a battle plan. With Down syndrome, there is a finite number of things that can go awry. With a typical child, there's isn't. It's a crap shoot. I'm sticking with the Ds and taking the other two back to the hospital for a refund.

Head Above Water

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Saturday, June 5, 2010

Our Anniversary

I am a planner. I always have been. The Beloved is quite decidedly, not! I knew when I was 5 years old that I wanted my wedding gown to be of an antique champagne color, very Victorian and that the bouquet I would carry would have muted shades of roses and hydrangeas. The Beloved's style is more to pick up his tuxedo on the the day. Preferably via drive-thru, if at all possible!

While I admit that his impromptu style has led to many awesome and quite perfect trips up the coast with kids in tow and without any foreseeable room reservations, sometimes his easy approach to (dare I say it?) planning just doesn't work out.

And this is how we wound up at our 24th anniversary dinner with all three Littles in tow. Miss Suzie doesn't do drive-thru baby sitting. Yep. He waited too long to firm up a time for our special evening out and Miss Suzie high tailed it to the beach. We'd planned on taking our Littlest Squee with us anyway. Partly because I wanted to, but mostly since Jack's trip to the hopspittle, The Beloved wants him under the constant care of either one of us or The Other Mommy. (On Jack's first night home from the hopspittle, as I tucked him into his cradle, The Beloved kissed his head and said, "He's never moving out of our room, is he?" And it was not a question, but rather a statement of fact. It was The Beloved's affirmation to himself that Jack would be fine as long as he was sleeping beside us.)

So. Thanks to Kitchen Nightmares, we checked out a tiny little dump on the bad side of town that had been transformed into a great place to eat a delicious meal. On the 1 year recheck by Chef Ramsey, the place was still thriving. And it was right here in our little town! Right between an abandoned building and a late night hair salon.

But it was really, really, really good!

The kids behaved, the live band was good, and the food was really, really good! The Beloved wanted to know if the music might be too loud for The Duckling. The Girlie, or as I like to refer to her, My Sarcastic Twin, rolled her eyes at The Dear Daddy and said, "Dad. Do you really think this is the first time he's heard music this loud?" She was incredulous at the suggestion. I just read my menu as all eyes turned to me. What? Baby Head was fine. And he has heard much louder on any given trip to Wal-mart. Or say, all those months in utero. He was happily slamming his Mr. Moose against his car seat, and at one point he was pounding on his butterfly to the beat of the band. Really. He was. The boy has rhythm! When the band took a break, he took a nap, and he didn't even wake up when the band started up again. I'm pretty sure his first words will be song lyrics. Probably something from Nickelback, Aerosmith, Puddle of Mudd, Zeppelin...

So Happy Anniversary to us! With kids in tow!

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